The Mermaid Wanderer

These questions are stuck in my head. When I was young, I never had an answer to this. Well I did! I want to be a Teacher because my mom is a Teacher. I want to be a business woman because my sister is one. I want to be a Nurse because my brother is a Nurse. I want to go work abroad because my brothers are working abroad. I never did find my niche. I never knew what is the answer to those questions. And time flew so fast I was forced to decide what I want to be without thinking. So I went abroad. And I didn't liked it. Now that I'm an adult, I realized all I wanted is a pretty simple life. Where I can be a Mermaid anytime 😂 So I resigned from my corporate job that does pays well. And came back to the Philippines. Don't get me wrong, the path that I took before I got here is a bumpy road to say the least. It's not all magical, happy, full of rainbows. Not at all! I cried, got depressed, my anxiety is killing me all the time. But that's just part of it, to get ...

Yes! you read that right. That was my first impression from the moment we left home, to the time we hop on the plane. The 1 hour ride from Manila to Cebu made it seemed like forever! God! It's so hard for an impatient person like me to travel with kids. NEVER EASY! But, I prayed. I inhaled and exhaled. I kept my cool. And tried again! I stretched myself and tried the hardest to be patient. I had to! I need to understand what my kids are feeling and attend to them. I have to ask them what they need, so I will know and I can help them. My son was the hardest to understand, he tells nothing to me and all he says was he misses home. This breaks my heart into a million pieces. Because right there, I realized that I'm not their home. They seemed to feel like I've pulled them away from their home and the people they love at home. Sad! But this is on me, this is the outcome when you leave a toddler to your parents and work thousands of miles away. They knew they're your m...

Traveling solo has a lot of perks, you have your own freedom, you don't need to ask anybody's opinion about anything. You don't have to wait for someone to get ready for your tours and etc. And the one that I like the most is I can decide anytime if I want to cancel anything since all I need to ask are my other personalities which sometimes pisses me off tbh. lol I've been doing that since I've embraced the idea of being solo. As I have mentioned on my posts, I was an expat before and decided to come back home after an excruciating amount of time wasted. After the pandemic hit the world, we were asked to work from home which gave me ample time to think on what to do next with my life. At a certain point in our lives, we lose control of what's happening to us, and our lives become controlled by fate. That's the world's greatest lie. ctto The Alchemist. So I've decided to take control of my life, to take control on what my future will look like. ...

A year of being in a limbo... Plans gone to waste, time, effort and especially mental health being severely affected. Everything changes from time to time and with the world being like this, I couldn’t accept it. I tried the hardest to get out of being stuck to something I don’t want. But when one book closes, another one will open. I’m here again, stuck in a limbo. But at least, I’m wearing my swimsuit and peacefully appreciating what God has given us. A paradise to live in ❤ ️ Remember, you can always choose your battle. 

For some people, all they ever dream was to work in a high rising company with a good pay, promised with an extensive career growth. For others, they dream of a simpler life, to be able to live happily with their family, to be able to go places they want, to be able to work remotely for the rest of their lives. And my dream was the latter. I spent almost 4 years in a country far away from home. Although the things that I had experienced was extraordinary, deep inside me is a woman crying in pain every-single-fucking-day! I never thought I’d despise corporate world so much! I thought that was my dream! And when I proved to myself that I can do it, the job that I was looking up to for an extensive time, became my nightmare! The first year was amazing, I was doing really good on my job (at least as per my manager). The 2 nd year was the starting point of all my struggles. Waking up in the morning became dreadful. The cycle of 8-5 was horrible! There are days where there’s a lot of jo...

I met this guy at a club in Dubai, we locked eyes and from there it was just magical. We weren’t a thing; he has his own life I have mine. But every weekends I go to the same club and he’s there, standing at the bar table, dashing as ever, with a smile that always melt my heart. I’ll let you in on a little secret, I easily catch feelings! He left Dubai for good and went back to his home country. And as a solo traveler, I now found a reason to fly to a place I know nothing about, and haven’t heard until recently. I flew in on Thursday and flew back to Dubai on a Saturday. A quick break to reality. I met him on my first night and had planned a trip on my second day, but he didn’t show up. Well he did, 6 hours after! I cancelled my paid tours just to be with him but he came so late that my whole day was spent for nothing. I sat at a park, and I contemplated as to why I cancelled my tours. See before I always depend my happiness to somebody else, being alone is amazing and all but it c...